Introducing the book The Art of Loving by Eric Fromm
What will be shown in the book The Art of Making Love is that love is not an emotion that anyone, regardless of their stage of puberty, can easily fall into. Eric Fromm, in his book The Art of Loving, emphasizes that this book is not a simple instruction for making love, and throughout the book, he introduces making love as an art.
In The Art of Loving, Eric Fromm tries to convince the reader that all his efforts to love are doomed to failure unless: he strives diligently to develop his character to the point where he reaches a constructive nose.
An excerpt from the book states:
This book wants to prove that if a person does not love his neighbor and lacks true humility, courage, faith and discipline, he will not be satisfied with one’s love. In cultures where these traits are rare, acquiring the talent of sealing will inevitably be a rare success.
The author goes on to say:
To avoid unnecessary complications, I have tried to present the issues in as non-technical language as possible; And for this reason, I have referred less to the works and sources related to love and I have refrained from doing so.
The Art Book of Love
In the book, Eric Fromm discusses the fact that love is known by two things:
Depth of interaction
And he goes on to say that whenever we see a relationship or a feeling that is empty of the two, we must take back the name of love.
In this book, Eric Fromm points out that the discussion is not about valuing and trivializing diverse human relationships. A range of desires and tendencies bring a man and a woman closer together, but only one of them is called love. Friendship, affection, affection, spiritual attractions, physical attractions, and 5,000 other names can be found for each of these attractions, but one and only one is called love.
The first paragraph of The Art of Loving is as follows:
Is love art? If it is art, does it need knowledge and effort? Is love a pleasant emotion, the understanding of which depends on one’s luck, that is, if luck helps, one will be “caught”? The topics in this little book are based on the first question, while today most people undoubtedly believe more in the second interpretation.
The table of contents of the book The Art of Making Love is:
Is loving art?
Love and its decline in contemporary Western society
A word about the author
Before the main content, a short text from Paracelsus is given in the book:
He who knows nothing does not love anything. He who can do nothing understands nothing. He who understands nothing is worthless. But he who understands; Undoubtedly they love, they observe, they see… The more human knowledge is inherent in something, the greater the love the more one thinks that all fruits arrive at the same time that strawberries know nothing about grapes.
About the book The Art of Loving
Love knows no bounds, my dear. He never had. Love does not set boundaries. I can invite everyone in the world for a cup of tea. I can talk to a stranger for hours and even fall in love with the way he blinks. I can follow a cat on the street for no reason and eat the most delicious food in the world. I can fall in love with a sleeping cartoon wanderer and write a lyric in its description.
Sing a poem to the person sitting next to me on the bus. I get a lighter under the discomfort of every human being. I can leave a love letter with a box of chocolates in the back of every house and run away. I can buy a bunch of flowers and give one of those flowers to whomever I meet on the street, to the child who passes by me, to the man who smokes deep packs on the street corner, to the obscene prostitute who curses him. …
Love has no borders, dear John, it is not limited to one person… Love must be given to everything and everyone. Otherwise, the world will stink.
Read the book The Art of Loving to understand the problem of human existence, to understand the love of parents for their children, to understand the beloved and to love yourself.
One of the most important and different topics about the art of making love is that after a detailed study of love from a theoretical point of view, love is practiced. But make no mistake. Eric Forum does not offer formulas or tips for making love. In practicing love, Eric Fromm targets the true self of man and helps him to develop.
For example, in this section, he refers to issues such as: discipline, concentration and tolerance.
Excerpts from the text of the book The Art of Loving
Is love art? If it is art, does it need knowledge and effort? Is love a pleasant emotion, the understanding of which depends on one’s luck, that is, something that, if luck helps, one is “caught” in?
If someone tells us that he loves flowers. But to see that he often forgets to give water to his flowers, we do not believe his love for flowers. Love is a serious desire to live and nurture what we cherish. When there is no serious desire, there is no love.
There is a need in human beings to always consider themselves different from others.
Yes, others may not understand our behavior, but what should we do !? If others expect us to do only what they understand and make decisions that they understand why, they actually expect us to be their life, their level of understanding, and their outlook on life. Let them say we are irrational or anti-social, but it is worth being ourselves!
As long as our behavior and our decisions do not hurt anyone. We do not owe anyone an explanation; How many lives have been wasted with this explanation of vain desires and attempts to convince others.
The problem for many people is that they love themselves in the first place, not themselves.
A person who is aware of his being human and opens the way of life to himself with the light of love, is a person who first of all tries to see himself and the world as it is. A human being who has a strong sense of responsibility and respect for himself and, considering that it is a condition of human love and wisdom, seeks to make his personality and wholeness stronger and stronger every time.
Love is being active, not taking action; It is ‘stability’, not ‘captivity’. In general, the active attribute of love can be expressed as that love is primarily a gift, not a receipt.
Being in love with someone is not just a strong feeling, but a decision, a judgment, a promise. If love were just a feeling, there would be no meaning to the stability of the promise that we will love each other forever. It feels and may disappear on its own. How can I judge the sustainability of my action when it has nothing to do with judgment?
Introducing the book The Art of Loving
One who reads Eric Fromm’s book The Art of Loving, hoping to find easy-to-follow instructions for the art of making love; At the end of the book, he realizes that he wasted his time. upside down; In this book, it will be shown that love is not an emotion that any person, regardless of their level of development and maturity, can easily surrender to.
The Art of Loving aims to convince the reader that he must work very hard to develop his whole character in order to determine the direction of the creators, otherwise all his efforts to make love will be in vain.
Because without loving one’s neighbor and without true humility, courage, faith and discipline, it is impossible to have a true personal love. In cultures where the above traits are rare, the acquisition of the talent for love is inevitably a rare achievement. And although everyone can ask themselves how many self-sacrificing people they really know about true love.
“Love is the only wise and satisfying answer to the riddle of human existence,” says Dr. Erich Fromm. Therefore, most of us are not able to see our talents to the extent that they are considered true love; To cultivate a love mixed with maturity, self-knowledge, courage and bravery. In addition to examining romantic love, which has been met with aura of misconceptions; It studies love from all angles and examines love between parents and children, brotherly love, sexual love, self-love, and love of God. He says learning the art of love, like any other art, requires practice and concentration.
The forum book is full of controversial and unprecedented ideas and thoughts and many naked facts that explore contemporary society and the barriers that this society creates between individuals and their attainment of love. Dr. Forum is a man of vast knowledge and his talent is that he can write very complex subjects in vivid, humane and extremely interesting ways.
In part of the book we read:
Is loving art an art? If we accept that it is so; As a result, achieving it requires knowledge and effort, or is love a pleasant feeling, the experience of which depends only on a person’s luck, and only the one who is lucky “falls in love”? This little book is based on the first theorem, while most people today undoubtedly believe in the second theorem.
Introducing the book The Art of Loving
“The Art of Making Love” by Eric Fromm (1980-1900) is a German psychologist.
Eric Fromm writes in the foreword to this book:
One who reads this book in the hope of finding easy-to-follow instructions for the art of love; At the end of the book, he realizes that he wasted his time. upside down; In this book, it will be shown that love is not an emotion that any person, regardless of their level of growth and maturity, can easily surrender to. This book aims to convince the reader that he must work very hard to develop his whole character in order to achieve a constructive direction, and all his efforts to make love will be in vain.
Because without loving one’s neighbor and without true humility, courage, faith and discipline, it is impossible to have a true personal love. In cultures where the above traits are rare, the acquisition of the talent for love is inevitably a rare achievement. And although one can ask oneself how many true self-sacrificing people one really knows.
However, the difficulty is not the reason to avoid identifying problems and examining the conditions for achieving the goal. To avoid unnecessary complications, I have tried to express issues in non-specialized language as much as possible. And for this reason, I have referred less to the available literary sources on love.
2- Introducing the book in Aparat